the convulsing before the phone calls

Earlier today, I picked up the phone on a mission to call some churches and friends. My body starts shaking and I can tell that if I open my mouth to speak it may be hard to understand me due to the extreme vibration in my voice. This is the difficult side of fundraising. The side that makes me want to throw in the towel but Satan will NOT win this battle. After staring at the phone for a good twenty minutes I discovered the courage or really had just reached the point of being SO annoyed at my cowardice that I had to start calling. So a half hour later, I am still convulsing from nerves and have three fundraising appointments for next week. I must remember:

"For we are not like many, peddling the word of God, but as from sincerity, but as from God, we speak in Christ in the sight of God." 2 Corinthians 2:17

First day of many

Well, I am home. I got home Saturday night at about 11:30 p.m., unpacked (kind of) and went to bed. Then Sunday morning I got up for church, came home, talked to Sonya, went to Lincoln and then over the course of the last 24 hours have had 6 fundraising appointments! Praise the LORD for His people who have encouraged and challenged me. From what I have at this point, I am at 7% of my budget. There are still some folks I met with today and yesterday that are praying about what to give.

Honestly, I am absolutely overwhelmed that anyone would consider giving their money to what God is doing through me. It makes me want to cry and shout and jump around simultaneously. It also really makes me see a tangible expression of God's goodness.

God is amazing. Have a mentioned that recently? He is amazing in so many ways but the way I have been pondering recently is how he personally meets his people's needs. He ALWAYS provides what we need- be it his peace or something as large as 28 grand. I am so glad that I belong to Christ!

In other news, I am tired. I fell asleep in between appointments today for a good 3 hours! The conference wore me out.

Ooh.. the conference. I will post some stuff up here later about what I learned. Because, man did I learn a lot.

nerves

Hey friends!

I am at the Glen again and I am getting ready to leave on Saturaday. Please pray for:

1)Strength and courage as I face fundraising. I think that the biggest obstacle is my own fear
2) Pray for my 5(maybe 6 appointments) next week- praise God for people willing to listen to what he is doing in my life.

Praise God for how faithful he has already been and just that he has given me the grace to serve him and to spend this week with people who love him too!

Love ya!

Guess who knows where they are going....

Hey friends,

I am on the computer at the Castle at the Glen and I wanted to say hi, put some prayer requests out and also let you all know where I will be pursuing the lost next year.

(Let the drum roll begin)....


I will be at




KANSAS STATE UNIVERSITY!!!!!

I am SO excited but I feel a little bit traiterous. Who will I cheer for when the Huskers are in town?!

Here are some things you can pray for me:

1) Romans 9:3 That my heart would break for the lost at KSU
2) Team unity and love. May I love the people on my team (Meredith Reeves, Ben Chesnut, Ben Deaver and Joel and Jen Johnson) as Christ loves me! I am thinking of verses like Phil 2:3-4 and John 13 (maybe 15).
3) Trusting God. I don't want to be rebellious out of fear!
4) Donors hearts- may the people I talk to catch the vision whether or not they are financially able to give. We send out our letters tommorrow.

I look forward to seeing some of you soon and others of you later.

Peace out!

final post for a while

Hey friends!

I am writing to tell you that I will not be writing for a while. On Monday I leave for training for EDGE corps. For those of you who don't know what it is. It is a short term missionary assignment with the Navigators. I am feeling the stress for sure. I am SO excited to meet people and find out what campus God has called me to next year but I am still very overwhelmed.

The fundraising homework I have left consists of: half of a Bible study and budgeting. I am sure it will get done, but I am feeling the bondage to my laziness.

In other news I got to 250 contacts on my fundraising sheet. I think that is GOOD. I am very pleased.

If you are the praying sort please lift up the following while I am gone:
1)Pray for friends. I am going to be meeting a lot of new people. (John 15:12)
2) Pray for energy. It will be emotionally, spiritually and probably physically demanding. (1 Cor 9:26-27)
3) Peace about my placement. I have been experiencing a lot of fear about placement and confusion over the whole experience. I will find out at the conference where I am going. (Psalm 112:6-7)
4) Pray that God would captivate me with his love and that love would cause me to be obedient. I want to rely on God fully. (Psalm 63)
5) Pray for my potential donors. We will send out our first letter at the conference. Pray for encouragement in monetary form when I get home. (Phil 4:19)
6) Pray for my family- that they would be at peace with where God puts me.

If you weren't in Nebraska today, the weather was horrendous! It rained ALL day long...ick!

Have a great couple of weeks.

1 a.m. and only to the R's...

Let me just say I had a fight with my printer tonight and I did not get out unscathed. Goodnight!

Sonya and I. This is the only picture of me in my graduation gown.

Jill and I.

I love this picture of Tracy and me.

We did this to Phil

The women in the picture below taught the men to do this with their towels

Let me know if this is too scandalous

This is Rachael, me and Jill at my Birthday party

The strange man in the house and other entertaining news

So, tonight my family and I are sitting in the living room watching Along came Polly (Jennifer Aniston, Ben Stiller- not a good movie don't see it). My mom, dad, stepbrother, his girlfriend and myself are all in the living room. The front door opens, closes and someone definitely walks in. Everyone in the room is thinking the same thing- what the heck? I was counting and making sure we were all there and trying to figure out who would just come into our house without knocking. Any ideas yet? Yep. You guessed it. My brother came home for the weekend without telling any of us he was going to come home. He is in the Army and since tommorrow is declared a national day of mourning for President Reagan he got the day off and decided to come home. Yay!

In other news, I bought 100 dollars worth of stamps today. It was a funny exchange. I went to the post office and asked for 300 stamps. The woman at the counter got them for me, no problems. She went on to tell me that the total was one thirteen twenty two. I am certain my jaw dropped to the floor as I replied "You mean one-hundred dollars?" The clerk went on to explain to me that one set of 100 stamps is 37 dollars so if you get three... I cut her off and said yeah I understand I was just a little shocked. I left the post office feeling rather silly.

I was thinking about it and I have only spent over 100 dollars of my own money on something twice in my life. When I was in high school I saved up money for a C.D player for my car (that was about 200 dollars six years ago). This would be the other time. Wow. It just seems like 37 cent things should not total to that much money-ever.

I know you are dying to know... I did go to Omaha Bible study last night and it was very encouraging. We discussed Psalm 23 and how God is our Shepherd and what our response is to that. I am so thankful that God does guide me, go before me and want me to listen to His voice and follow Him. Kira and Baracah were great Bible study leaders and I was in a group with awesome people. All in all though, I probably only knew half of the people there. Which took me by surprise because I led the Omaha study last summer.(Phil, are you happy with my English now?)

I got some pictures developed today and I just about cried when I looked at them. I have such great friends- I am very blessed and I miss them so much. I will post some so you can see them too.:) You have to promise me that you won't cry though.

Ammendment to my post: I am a BIG fat liar. I have paid more than a hundred dollars at a time for rent and tuition. But that seems reasonable... stamps? No way!

Hymn #508

I found this in a hymnal a few years back and it has spoken to me a couple of times now. I am not sure that I agree theologically with all of it and not all of it is accurate to how I feel but I thought I would share it. I hope I am not breaking any copyright laws. It is by Catherine Marshall.

Father, once I had such big dreams so much anticipation of the future.
Now, no shimmering horizon beckons me; my days are lack-lustre.
I see so little of value in the daily round.
Where is your plan for my life?

You have told us that without vision; we men perish.
So, Father in heaven, knowing that I can ask in confidence for what is your expressed will to give me, I ask you to deposit in my mind and heart that particular dream- the special vision you have for my life.

I sense this may involve adventures I have not bargained for.
But I want to trust you enough to follow even if you lead along new paths. I admit to liking some of my ruts. But I know that habit patterns that seem like cozy nests from inside from your vantage points can be prisons.

Lord, if you have to break down any prisons of mine before I can see the stars and catch the vision, then Lord begin the process now.

3rd day in a row

To clarify the title of this post, I am posting for the third day in a row and I am proud of my discipline. Blogging has been fun (at least for the three days I have been doing it).

Today was good. I went to bed earlier last night in an effort to get up earlier today. That didn't work as well as I would have hoped. I couldn't fall asleep any earlier than usual thus I didn't get up any earlier than usual. Oh well, I will try again tonight.

Today I haven't done any fundraising stuff yet. I should get on that. My "homework" is due at the Summit. I still have to look at my budget, do a Bible study on fundraising, revise my letter and print my envelopes.

On a fun note, I talked to two of my future EDGE participants tonight. Their names are Chad and Mindy. They are both coming from South Dakota to the Summit and responded to my email asking for a ride home. I called them tonight to tell them I didn't need a ride. How funny. We ended up talking for 45 minutes or so. It was really nice. They both seemed really sweet. I am now getting excited. Chad made me feel a little better about my worries about moving to a new place. It seems others can identify to some extent and he reminded me that we are all in the same boat. That also helped.

I am working really hard at writing a longer or shorter post. They have all been about the same length. I am planning on going to Omaha Bible study tommorrow night. I am excited to see people and just to check it out.

Lazy last week of summer

Wow. My summer has been really lazy. I woke up at 12:30 then I spent about four hours with Evangeline doing accountability. It was really great. Lots of James 5:16 going on: "Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." Although neither of us are righteous men you get the point. Then, I came home and ate dinner. Somehow, I have spent the rest of the night doing stuff. Oh yeah, I talked to Ben C-nut. We may not ride down to the EDGE summit together anymore. That is cool. He is in a wedding and needs to make sure he can get back for it. He will either fly or ride with us in his car. If we ride in his car, Jaci and I will need a ride home so I sent an email to many strangers (soon to not be strangers) that I will be doing EDGE corps with next fall and asked for a ride home for Jaci and I. We'll see who replies.

Tonight I am hanging out around home working on my fundraising database. We are getting there. I have 200 names and more addresses than I did last time I posted about this. EDGE wants me to have 300. Wow, my life is boring. I am telling you all how many names I have in my database.

On another note, I laughed really hard at the comments on my 2nd post. You should check them out.

2nd Post...Cal that title is for you

The past day has been relatively uneventful. Last night, I watched the Princess Bride for the first time ever. It was pretty funny. In a lot of ways though it was SO 1980's that I was unimpressed. It was a good time though. Jake, if you're reading this, you need to see the movie. It is NOT a chickflick and you would probably appreciate the humor.

I watched the movie with Travis and we had some really good conversation. I would classify it as actual fellowship. We talked about rock music and whether or not it was sinful. We also discussed how Christians try and perform for God and we have a very hard time understanding that our standing before God has nothing to do with our goodness. It had nothing to do with our "goodness" when Christ accepted us into his family and it has nothing to do with our goodness now that we are in his family. Easy to say, tough to believe. I left his place encouraged to seek God.

So, that was Saturday night. Saturday afternoon I shopped with my mother all day and only bought one shirt. That's women for ya!

In other news, I set my alarm clock for p.m. instead of a.m. this morning (I havent't used my alarm but once this summer) and missed church as a result. That was frustrating. Omaha church and I have severe problems going together.

This morning it occured to me that in a little over a week I will be in Colorado starting my EDGE adventure. It doesn't seem real. Maybe it shouldn't yet.

Oh well. I am off to find Wal-mart and develop some pictures.

Oh the excitement of blogging

Hey everyone!

This is my first blog and it is a lot harder than I thought it would be. Welcome. Hopefully, this will be a fun place to read about my life adventures this next year.

Cal says that blogging is "all down hill from here."

Well, I had an awesome birthday today. My friends Evie and Rachael planned me a party. Before the party I got to spend quality time with Evie, Jill and Rachael. They took me to Chili's where we enjoyed dinner and good fellowship. I think it is really neat how Christians can relate with each other- even if they don't know each other very well. The only frustrating part of the day was having to clean up my house for the party. That was disappointing.

Lately, I have been putting together fundraising stuff. I have learned that administration is NOT my first love. I am presently just assembling a list of names to send my first letter asking for prayer/ financial support. The task is daunting. EDGE wants me to have 300 contacts. I am at 180 minus about 50 addresses still. I need more patience. Although, it has been neat to see God bring names to mind and see him provide contacts in interesting ways.:)

Speaking of EDGE corps, I leave for EDGE conference June 14. I am very excited but also a little nervous for the whole adventure to begin. It is certainly going to be a challenging and exciting time in life.

I am not sure how to end a post... I will work on this. For American Idol fans out there I could say Jenny out but that is WAY too cheesy.